Mt. Rushmore

Let's just say Dan greatly dislikes when I write Debbie Downer posts which is apparently the umbrella under which my last one falls.  So this is my peace offering.  And I will also admit, this is the blog version of nesting.  I really need to get all the old news out of the way in time for the new news of the baby.

Back in the summer, we had tentatively blocked off a long weekend for a last summer visit to Utah.  Dan is so lucky to get every other Friday off, so he arranged to take off a Thursday before and there we were free as birds.  But it turned out our ideal weekend was actually the weekend his parents were moving homes and we figured our descension would be the absolute last thing they needed.  But the time was already blocked off so after a little thought, we decided a quick trip to Mt. Rushmore was in order.

And I have to make a public apology right now to the great state of South Dakota: I am so sorry! I always imagined you as one of the most boring states in the Union and never had any desire to visit you.  But after our trip, I can honestly say that I was SO wrong.  I will never doubt you again!

Seriously, we are going back. Spending a week would be easy.  It may just turn out to be another weekend, but we know now for sure, that it will be a great time.



We stayed in a little cabin in Custer.  It was a great big room with 3 beds, a bathroom, and a little kitchenette.  It also had a nice covered porch where we ate a few of our meals.

Finn had to sleep in the bathroom, which was a tight squeeze and caused some stress for Ava who worried she'd need to use the facilities after bedtime, but we all got used to it and it worked out okay.

  Behind our cabin was a great hill with rocks for climbing.

Like always, Dan did his research and planned a beautiful route to for us to drive to Mt. Rushmore.  The road was called the Iron Mountain Road.

It had spectacular views,

winding turns called pig tails,

and a few one way tunnels that framed Mt. Rushmore in the distance, which is hard to see in this picture, but take my word for it.

You had to honk your horn when you drove through and the kids got a kick out of that.



 Mt. Rushmore was pretty amazing, and I was so happy the kids thought so too.  Max still talks about it.

The face of each of the pillars represented a state.  Everyone stopped to take their picture with "their"state.  I'm not going to lie, we were torn.  But when we discovered that Texas had been shoved on the backside of a pillar backing right to the fence, where staging a family picture there was nearly impossible, we took it as a sign to embrace our new state.

Finn caught on very quickly and posed in front of every single pillar.

The boys stopped to look at a sweet little chipmunk and this was the moment I realized that Finn could actually fit through the rungs on the fence, I dropped my phone back in my bag, and grabbed him just in time.

After hiking down around the base of the mountain and eating dinner outside the restaurant in the beautiful evening sun, 

we were less than an hour from the evening program, which we really wanted to see. But the parents in us had second thoughts about keeping the kids up extra late on our first night, so we headed back to the cabin and figured we'd catch it another night if we could.

The following day, again under Dan's faithful research, we headed into Custer State Park (which is absolutely beautiful) and hiked around Sylvan Lake. 

The landscape was unlike any I'd seen in person before and we were all in awe.

Max took a minute to warm up to the whole thing because he somehow fell right out of the van as we were getting out. 

Our plans had always included to have the kids wear or at least bring their swimsuits for a dip in the lake but on our drive over that morning, we realized we forgot them, thus providing yet another "you can walk into the water but don't get your clothes wet" situation. 

 

And as is traditional, they rode home soggy but happy.

We debated on making a run for the swimsuits and returning to the lake but settled on going back to the cabin and Finn and I staying in for a nap while Dan took the big kids to the pool.

We spent a very enjoyable few hours at Reptile Gardens.  The weather was perfect and there were no crowds.

The kids loved seeing all the snake and spider displays as well as a alligator show and snake show.

Both of which involved petting opportunities afterwards.

We also met this 107 year old tortoise and saw a bird show.

We had the great opportunity to be reminded how big our family has gotten as well as how much money we can waste on greasy food, when we dropped 50 bones at Dairy Queen,

and Dan nearly had to take two trips for our personal pan pizzas.

                                        

We saw more motorcycles than we have in our previous years of life combined.  It was the week before Sturgis but I can't imagine there being any more motorcycles.

We made it back to Mt. Rushmore for the evening show.  It was a more adult affair that I'm not sure the kids appreciated, but it was cool to see it lit up at night.

Cool enough, thank goodness, that right before we got in the car and drove away, I was inspired to take another picture, which caused me to realize that my phone had fallen out of my pocket somewhere in the park.  A quick call confirmed that it had been turned it at the front desk and a real crisis was averted.

Right before we left town we made a stop at crazy horse.  It's different than Mt. Rushmore, being a private entity, basically existing because of one man (and his very large family's) vision and work.  They have already established a Native American College on site.  The circumstances surrounding the place are just very interesting.  

Also, the scale of it just huge.  Way bigger than Rushmore, 

We took a short bus ride up to the base.  Finn was so excited to see Crazy Horse.

Actually it was a mama and baby cow he was really jazzed about.

But it really was impressive.  Though obviously not finished,  I hope my kids will be able to go back some day to see it complete.

In My Absence

I hate how long it's been since I've posted.  I've had plenty of moments where I feel like I am on the verge of actual combustion and the only thing I can think to relieve the pressure is to sit down empty my heart and head of all the words that are in there.  But inevitably, each time I would sit down to do it,  I just couldn't.  I don't know why exactly, but I think it is because I'm recognizing the need to take into account the feelings and privacy of growing children. There are still plenty of poop and diaper stories to be told, but on the front end of the spectrum, my older kid's business is becoming their own and I find myself thinking twice about what I share.

But man, things have been really hard.  I am exhausted physically, mentally, emotionally. And of course, when I am feeling particularly defeated by the four humans that run my life, I am reminded that there is one more and I nearly weep with fear because I have no idea how I will ever handle it.  I take that back, I will handle it.  I will have no choice but to handle it.  But my fear comes from how ugly it's going to be.

Then, I think about my last tiny little human, days from arriving.  How sweet and soft and warm. And I cannot wait to see his face and have that little head tucked under my cheek.

He feels like he could fall out any minute, by the way.  Maybe that's what happens by the time you get to 5, they just fall out.  I wouldn't complain about it.  I have been having so many contractions and I was dilated to a 4 at my last appointment, both of which are uncharacteristic for me.  I love it when I get a stretch of painful contractions and I start hoping and praying that these are the ones, that this is it.  And then  I remember that my help (my sister, Chandra) won't be here for 3 more weeks and I start contradicting my own prayers and begging that the baby can just hang in there another week or so.

Right now I am scheduled for an induction on September 26.  That is subject to change based on my dilation at my next appointment though.  I am a little over thirty minutes from the hospital and I need to be sure to get in enough doses of antibiotics during labor (strep b positive).  So if it looks like labor will be too short when it happens, the doctor may choose to take matters into his own hands. I'm in complete agreement and I really don't want to have a baby on the freeway.

All the rest of life has just been trudging along. Dan will be switching jobs at work.  He is excited to be doing something a little bit different.

Ava is still struggling but if I try really hard to see things objectively, I must admit that things could be worse.  Her horseback riding has been just what the doctor ordered though. She has been doing great and loving it.  And that is exactly what she needs.  I am excited to take her each week and she's excited to go.  I sit on my bench and watch with a huge dopey smile on my face that I can not erase. I am fully aware of many of the benefits that are available from riding, but I have been pleasantly reminded of a whole host of others that I hadn't remembered.

She is actually a bit of a natural and picks up the skills fairly quickly, especially for her, someone who has always struggled with physical things.  And it helps so much that it's a private lesson.  She has no one to compare herself to.  And she also doesn't know enough about riding to know how good or not good she is.  She just goes and does it and likes it.

Luke has started soccer and I hate it so much.  I mean, I'm glad he's getting a chance to do something he'd like to do, but it's killing me.  We purposely picked a more recreational division to avoid multiple practices a week but for some (un)lucky reason we ended up on a team that practices twice a week anyways.  So Monday and Wednesday afternoons, I drag all the kids but Ava (don't tell CPS) to soccer practice which is great fun for them because Max and Finn love to play on the elementary school playground while Luke practices.  Unfortunately, it's one of those playgrounds where the equipment includes all sorts of drop offs without railings.  So I enviously look on at the moms lounging on their blankets in the nice cool grass while I, for the next hour, run through the rocks on my swollen sausage sandal feet saving Finn's life over and over again before he turns around backwards and drops over the edge of the 6 feet drop.

And then it's on to home where everybody wants to eat dinner again and at least 40% of them will hate what I make and then I have to squeeze in homework (math of all things) with a tired and emotional Ava, which cannot be completed without somebody crying, guaranteed.  I hate fourth grade math as much as she does, and I know it's all fad-ish to bag on common core, but I seriously think it is the dumbest thing ever.


Luke's first game was on Saturday.  He played goalie.

I have no idea if he'll always be goalie or not, but I do hope he gets a turn to try out some other positions.  I had an out of body experience at that game.  It started when I had to let Dan and Luke and Ava out near the fields where thousands (I am not exaggerating) of parents and little soccer players covered acres worth of fields like piles of milling ants, while I drove around stalking people on the way to their cars hoping to to get lucky enough to snag their spot. Once I parked, I carried a couple of chairs on one shoulder, my purse filled with water bottles and snacks on the other, and held two little boy hands through the parking lot and across field after field, contraction after contraction, searching for Luke's.  And at this point I was floating in the air, watching myself and saying, "What the hail are you doing, Elise? This ranks right up there with some of the dumbest things you've ever done."  Because, really, what were we doing?  Just because hundreds of other families have decided that it's really a great idea to have their kids play sports from super young ages and "develop a skill" or "build a dream", more power to them, but I don't think I'm actually on board.  Well, apparently I am on board because I was there, and we are doing it, but I really don't want to. The whole thing just seemed so absurd to me right then.  I want to be able to say that the joy on Luke's face and the progress we see makes the whole thing worth it, but I can't.  I think he (and we) would be just as happy taking our Saturday hikes as a family, like our last one to Garden of the Gods,

 which we have temporarily traded in for Saturdays like the one I described above.

I'm like pure sunshine right now, huh?

In other news, Finn started nursery at church 2 weeks ago.  So far he is not a fan.  I thought he might really dig the toys and kids, but so far he just can't get over being left.

And we welcomed a new member to our family.  But I just realized I don't have a picture.

Pretend there is a picture right here of a shiny new red van.

We thought long and hard about this decision.  I was adamant that we get a vehicle with another seat. At first we were convinced we'd go the SUV route, since our future plans include a camper and we will need a vehicle that can tow it.  And of course, SUV's are so much cooler than minivans, so that wouldn't hurt.  But then I kept thinking about how actually uncool it would be to have my four year old open the the door of our swaggy Suburban into the car parked beside us at the grocery store and I started to rethink my entire life.

So that is how we settled on an eight seat Sienna with magic doors. And I am so happy with it. The only drawback, mostly in Dan's eyes, is the unfortunate red color. Sadly, Dan decided to sell his Versa because he could get more money for it, and keep the blue van.  So don't tell anyone, but we are now a two minivan family which I'm sure qualifies us as some of the most uncool people on earth. But at this juncture in life, I'm not really sure I care.